Are you on the same page as your Christian dating partner?

Christian relationship

Do you know what your partner wants?

While you may spend time with your Christian dating partner and feel a certain intimacy with them, they may still not be willing to share a real commitment with you. While you may feel certain you have found the one person you would like to spend the rest of your life with you may find that your partner is not so sure. So what are the reasons we find ourselves on different pages to our Christian dating partners?

#1: We have different relationship timelines christian dating commitment

While you may have one timeline in mind, your dating partner might have an entirely different concept of the natural progression for a Christian dating relationship. It is important to discuss these issues beforehand so that you know that you are not wasting your time and his or hers. At the end of the day a person’s commitment tempo has nothing to do with how long the relationship has been going for. I have known some couples who were so obviously meant to be together and yet they held off getting married for various reasons. Did they get married in the end? Yes. Was it a waste of their time? That is a question only they can answer.

#2: We have different depths of emotional connection

Men and women feel emotional connection differently. It’s what makes us unique, what makes relationships between men and women work and most often what makes relationships between men and women fall apart. The fact of the matter is that women will often draw a man in with conversation and request a verbal commitment in some way whereas a man either feels this commitment or doesn’t. If he isn’t certain about that commitment and he is pushed to make a decision, he will more than likely withdraw. It is important for women to allow a man to come to the conclusion that they want this commitment rather than for them to push them into a marriage that may not work as a result. But then, if the man is getting everything he needs from the relationship, he may never move forward. So, it is also important for women to know where to draw the line.

#3: Lack of real communication from both Christian dating partners

If you are always the one sharing your feelings first and you don’t know where your partner stands concerning the issues you are bringing up, chances are they are not being honest about their feelings. The more you talk about your own feelings, the more the other person feels like they are being attacked. If it is the other person who has a clear problem, stop, wait and allow them to open up to you without badgering them with your own insecurities.

#4: We have different visions and expectations out of life

If you aren’t clear about your vision and expectations of the future from the beginning, you may find that you are on a completely different page to your Christian dating partner only a few short months/years down the line from having begun the relationship. You are who you are and you have dreams that need to be fulfilled. You also have a spiritual life that needs to grow continuously. If you have the call of God on your life and are expecting to go into full-time ministry at some point and your partner has no such call on his or her life and is not even willing to consider going into full-time ministry, either God will have to change their minds or you are going to run into a disagreement when that call becomes a reality in your life. This is just one example as to how visions and expectations can have an effect on your relationship.

At the end of the day, it comes down to making sure that your needs and wants are clearly set out at the beginning of your relationship. While some may be hesitant to do this at first, the real reason for dating is, in fact, to find a life partner, and if your partner is so scared of commitment that they can’t even talk about what their hopes and dreams for the future are, perhaps they are not dating with the best intentions and they will probably end up breaking your heart anyway. Remember, guard your hearts at all times. God Bless!

Like this article? Got questions or feedback? Feel free to leave a comment or Join our Facebook community at Christians Online Australia to connect and share with fellow Christians.

While you may spend time with your Christian dating partner and feel a certain intimacy with them, they may still not be willing to share a real commitment with you. While you may feel certain you have found the one person you would like to spend the rest of your life with you may find that your partner is not so sure. So what are the reasons we find ourselves on different pages to our Christian dating partners?

#1: We have different relationship timelines

While you may have one timeline in mind, your dating partner might have an entirely different concept of the natural progression for a Christian dating relationship. It is important to discuss these issues beforehand so that you know that you are not wasting your time and his or hers. At the end of the day a person’s commitment tempo has nothing to do with how long the relationship has been going for. I have known some couples who were so obviously meant to be together and yet they held off getting married for various reasons. Did they get married in the end? Yes. Was it a waste of their time? That is a question only they can answer.

#2: We have different depths of emotional connection

Men and women feel emotional connection differently. It’s what makes us unique, what makes relationships between men and women work and most often what makes relationships between men and women fall apart. The fact of the matter is that women will often draw a man in with conversation and request a verbal commitment in some way whereas a man either feels this commitment or doesn’t. If he isn’t certain about that commitment and he is pushed to make a decision, he will more than likely withdraw. It is important for women to allow a man to come to the conclusion that they want this commitment rather than for them to push them into a marriage that may not work as a result. But then, if the man is getting everything he needs from the relationship, he may never move forward. So, it is also important for women to know where to draw the line.

#3: Lack of real communication from both Christian dating partners

If you are always the one sharing your feelings first and you don’t know where your partner stands concerning the issues you are bringing up, chances are they are not being honest about their feelings. The more you talk about your own feelings, the more the other person feels like they are being attacked. If it is the other person who has a clear problem, stop, wait and allow them to open up to you without badgering them with your own insecurities.

#4: We have different visions and expectations out of life

If you aren’t clear about your vision and expectations of the future from the beginning, you may find that you are on a completely different page to your Christian dating partner only a few short months/years down the line from having begun the relationship. You are who you are and you have dreams that need to be fulfilled. You also have a spiritual life that needs to grow continuously. If you have the call of God on your life and are expecting to go into full-time ministry at some point and your partner has no such call on his or her life and is not even willing to consider going into full-time ministry, either God will have to change their minds or you are going to run into a disagreement when that call becomes a reality in your life. This is just one example as to how visions and expectations can have an effect on your relationship.

At the end of the day, it comes down to making sure that your needs and wants are clearly set out at the beginning of your relationship. While some may be hesitant to do this at first, the real reason for dating is, in fact, to find a life partner, and if your partner is so scared of commitment that they can’t even talk about what their hopes and dreams for the future are, perhaps they are not dating with the best intentions and they will probably end up breaking your heart anyway. Remember, guard your hearts at all times. God Bless!

Like this article? Got questions or feedback? Feel free to leave a comment or Join our Facebook community at Christians Online Australia to connect and share with fellow Christians.

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